


Blind Ambition

by IllyasJames



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Don't want to ruin it but the tittle is the biggest spoiler, Katsuki Yuuri Is a Victor Nikiforov Fan, M/M, Makka is a great help, Retirement, Victor Stops Skating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-28
Updated: 2018-05-28
Packaged: 2019-05-14 16:57:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14773538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IllyasJames/pseuds/IllyasJames
Summary: In canon Victor started his winning streak in the year he turned 23, here he disappears after a fan cuts his hair.Yuuri is devastated when right when he moves to Detroit, to work on his ambition to become one of the greatest skaters, and meet Victor Nikiforov on the ice one day, said skater suddenly drops out of the Grand Prix. Not to be seen on the ice again.Some say the pressure to be Russia's Golden boy had become too much, others mock that the loss of his hair had resulted in him also losing his talent, Yuuri decides that he will continue in his quest to become the best and one day find out what happened to Victor.





	Blind Ambition

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to bed. I was turning off my laptop when the idea of this story hit.
> 
> So instead of sleeping i'm forced to be writing this.

Yuuri puts the last of his posters up the wall of his new dorm room. It's going to be a struggle, both being in Detroit for the training facility to hone his skills on the ice and still attending classes over the internet of his actual university back in Japan. He's just glad the school understood and allowed for him to do most of his work online, only having to do his written exams during the off season and when he's in Japan for Local competitions and the Nationals. 

He smiles at the large, and pricely imported, poster of Victor doing one of his spins in last years routine. Yuuri still believes he should have gotten gold for that, but Victor is only twenty two so he still has enough years ahead of him and Yuuri knows that he'll be looking at Victor getting gold this year. 

Leaning back he wonders how long Victor will have that gold streak Yuuri knows he has the talent for before Yuuri is good enough to get on the ice with him and steal it from him. At least two years, as Yuuri is certain he'll not be getting a Grand Prix invite this year or the next, his points are just not yet good enough.

The alarm on his phone lets him know something about Victor just went online. He scrambles to pick it up and when he sees it's a YouTube link he hopes it's some lucky fan that posted a clip of Victor at his home rink practicing the new routine. 

Instead; he watches in horror at the video of Victor getting ambushed by some rabbit fan, leaving the skater Yuuri adores on the ground with a large piece of his hair missing before security swoops in and tackles the mad man that did it to the ground. Before the maker turns the camera to her own face, to tell her viewers how shocked she was about what she saw, Yuuri can clearly see Victor getting pulled up from the ground by Yakov and being escorted away while he's rubbing over the back of his head where his hair used to be.

Yuuri leans back, not hiding the tears running down his cheeks. Victor is always nice to his fans, so for one of them to do something like that. He also mourns Victor's hair; and all the fantasies he had about carting his fingers through he will never admit to. 

He quickly logs in to one of his fan accounts -and yes he has more than one- to leave a message on Victor's official fanpage. Victor must know not all of his fans are like that one.

No official statement about the attack are posted anywhere, but over the next few days Yuuri hears through the fan blogs that although Victor originally hadn't wanted to make a formal report to the police about the attack, his coach and management team had. There's a small post on the official site about Victor not wanting people to make too big of a fuss about things, stating things like this could always happen, yet it gets taken down in minutes. 

Yuuri is working on getting his triples clean when one of his rink mates suddenly yells over the ice that the Russian Team had pulled Victor from the Grand Prix roster. He's certain the fall on the ice he makes was more to do with him trying to turn towards her than him not getting his footing right. Celestino yells at him that this is no time to try for a quad, making Yuuri realize he indeed had gotten the right amount of rotation, but without clean triples he really shouldn't try. 

He travels back to Japan to compete in the Local competitions, getting some nice scores that will give him his ticket for Nationals for sure. Right after he gets his final score in and knows he is certain for Nationals he rushes off to his dorm room at the university knowing he has two exams coming up. First though he wants to check Victor's fansite to see if they have something about Victor going to the Russian Nationals.

Except when he goes to the fansite its contents is gone. In it's place is a letter stating that Victor will be stepping back from skating, he thanks all his fans for their support and hopes to keep hearing good things from them. No explanation as to why he decided to retire, just that he still loves the sport and wishes with all his heart that his fans will keep loving and supporting it now that he's gone. 

Three weeks later the whole site is gone. Leaving a dark spot in Yuuri's chest.

He scours the fanblogs in the weeks between Local and Nationals, every waking moment he's not training or doing school work he's online hoping that somewhere somebody knows why Victor suddenly gave up. At some places he finds people that are, like him, looking for the truth, and in other places there are the people getting joy out of saying the meanest things. 

After reading for the he-has-no-idea-how-maniest-time that Victor probably just got a depression about losing his hair and forgot how to skate without it, Yuuri finds himself ready to slam his laptop shut and maybe at a window. He has to remind himself that he's almost nineteen, that he is a functioning adult, and that he can't afford getting a new laptop as it is. He knows in his heart Victor isn't so shallow that his hair being cut would make him give up on something he exudes from every fiber of his being, he just doesn't know what could.

Yuuri decides to skate out his frustration over the situation, trying some different ways to do his routine. By the time Nationals rolls around he has one squad tightly under the knees, and although he doesn't place high enough in the 4CC to qualify for worlds he had only come a little short. One of the Japanese Officials even let him know that if he did some Ice shows in the off season they might get him in at least one qualifier for the Grand Prix the next year. He promises to do his best, and when a reporter asks him what his motivation was he answers that he skates for all the skaters that don't skate anymore. 

He sets out a new, and by all accounts gruesome, training schedule with Celestino when he return to the training facility in Detroit. The coach tries to talk him out of it but he refuses, this is no time to lack confidence. Even getting paired with a new training buddy from Thailand doesn't slow him down much, although Phichit does help him find some hours of relaxation by simply pinning him down on one of their beds and making him watch movies with him. 

When the next season rolls around, a lot of people seem to have already forgotten about Victor, one of the commentators simply stating that Yuuri has a routine similar to some Russian skater. It fuels his intent to make his performance memorable. His silver in the NHK means something for he was only allowed the entry on invite, he looks at the other two skaters who were both seeded due to their high scores during the world championships the previous year and knows he'll be going up against them at the championships this year. He smiles at Chris, who gives him a quick wink from the top position. 

With a Grand Prix medal on his nightstand he prepares for the rest of the season. Phichit screams at him over the phone when he calls him after getting gold at Nationals, and with the 4CC being in America they travel to it together. It's there Yuuri get's his first hater comment about still being a Nikiforov fan. 

Without Phichit to pick him up he would have crumbled at the sheer bile the young female skater from Canada spews at him. It isn't till Phichit tells him the girl must have been a fan of Yuuri that he realizes that apparently his love for Victor had made her feel as if no matter how much she liked Yuuri she could never get his whole attention. He never thought a fan who isn't recognized could do such hateful things just to get the attention they craved. 

He's so shaken he makes some mistakes in the first half of his routine, realizing he will need to pick himself up he decides to throw in his ace at the end. The quad Flip Victor had made his signature move, he makes it his last jump knowing that he practiced it enough to do it. When he poses his final position he knows that the roaring in his ears isn't just from his blood, the crowd has collectively lost their mind. Celestino isn't looking to happy as they had planned to reveal Yuuri's capability in doing the Flip at Worlds, but he needed the pick me up now. 

After repeating the Flip again in his Free skate Yuuri is certain he gets gold and a ticket for Worlds. Not to mention that unless he completely bombs Worlds he's certain to get seeded in the next Grand Prix series. 

He doesn't manage to get a podium spot at worlds, but only by a margin of a point, they still ask him to skate during the exhibition. Yuuri can't help but grin in every photo Phichit makes at the event, after all he's twenty years old and well on his way to get the streak he had wanted Victor to have. 

Chris sends him some odd texts the days after the banquet, which he can't remember much of as he might have drank a bit too much in celebration, he decides not to go too deeply into the other skater asking if Yuuri really still believes that if Victor still skated they all would have scooted down one position. After all, by now everyone knows Yuuri respects Victor for what he has done for the sport. He doesn't need to know he might have told the current World Champion he's actually just the number two in Yuuri's mind. 

He's definitely better off not knowing he did that while being stripped down to his underpants; challenging Chris to a dance-off if he dared to disagree. 

The next season goes by in a rush of adrenaline, getting gold and silver at his qualifiers, silver at the Grand Prix final under Chris, Gold at both Nationals as 4CC, only to land under Chris on the World podium by only two points difference. 

The fourth season after Victor retires goes only slightly better, with two gold qualifiers. To his increasing annoyance he can't seem to beat Chris, almost as if his intent to get gold fuels the other man to prevent him from getting it. The season ends with Yuuri swearing to himself next year he won't be content with anything but a complete gold streak. Especially as he since he is going to be the same age he was certain Victor would succeed in it. 

Planning his final year in school, his intent to return to Japan upon graduation, and trying to figure out what music to pick for his winning routines, Yuuri finds himself nearly overloading himself. He's about to just walk out of his dorm room when his phone starts ringing. Not feeling like picking up he contemplates to just let it go to voice mail, but it could be a sponsor and they never liked that. 

"Katsuki Yuuri." The gruff voice on the other end has a hard accent to it that Yuuri is certain he recognizes from someplace. 

"This is Katsuki Yuuri speaking yes?" Yuuri wonders if he should have pretended it was a wrong number. 

"Good. I am Yakov Feltsman. I am certain you have heard of me." the blood in Yuuri's veins nearly stops, why would the coach from the Russian team be calling him. "I have a proposition to make to you." It stays quiet for a moment. "Are you still there!"

Yuuri startles out of his own mind. "Yes Sir. I'm still here, I'm just trying to figure out why you would call me?" 

"You love Vitya, it shows in all you do on the ice. You are good, so I want you." Yuuri stares at his phone, he must have misunderstood. "Come to Russia when summer break starts. Our composer has music for you, he believes you can do the choreography honor. He is exclusive to us, but I believe him. Tickets will be payed by us." 

There is a loud defining click indicating that Yakov Feltsman expects nothing but Yuuri's agreement. Yuuri just sinks down at the small chair he has in the corner near his bed for his clothes. Sure he had dreamed about one day being in the facility Victor used to train, but he had put those in the back of his mind once he knew he and Victor would never train together. 

Celestino agrees that he should take this opportunity as he can't recall if anyone other than the people on the Russian team have ever even met the exclusive composer and choreographer they have. Assuring Yuuri that this is a once in a lifetime opportunity Phichit packs his bag the moment summer break rolls in. Even his parents tell him to go for it, Mari just jokes that he always wanted to go to Russia to train, and Minako even goes as far as to tell him he might find out what happened to his Victor. 

He arrives at St-Petersburg, with two suitcases and a whole stomach filled with nerves. To his surprise he gets picked up by Yuri Plisetsky and Georgi Popovich, both he knows from skating events and competitions. Both greet him in their own way taking his bags from him to escort him to the car. 

The next twenty minutes are the scariest in his life. For some reason Georgi acts like he's on a racetrack instead of the public road and still manages to look at Yuuri in the backseat at least half of the time, and not all of those are by using the rearview mirror. 

"You must know just how lucky you are. It is not every day somebody gets offered one of his compositions and choreography's, he is very selective about them." Georgi sighs deeply. Yuri just scowls at the older skater.

"Are you honestly still upset that he refused to compose something to show the world how much you love that girlfriend of yours." Yuri looks at Yuuri in the backseat. "Honestly the old man had a good eye in not going for it," pointing at Georgi "as this fool wanted some lovesick duo dance so that he could use it as an exhibition piece." 

Yuuri just listens at Georgi going on about how Yura doesn't understand about love as he's only fourteen, how he'll figure it out once he is mature enough to skate with the seniors.

"Ha. That has nothing to do with anything. I will become Junior champion this year in Sochi and after that I will go on and get all the gold in Seniors." He looks at Yuuri. "So I hope you'll enjoy this season, after this year your chances of getting gold will be gone. Even if the old man helps you out." 

They stop in front of a very rich building which to Yuuri's amazement houses a ballet school. Georgi tells Yura to show Yuuri where he should go while he parks the car. The young teen simply stomps making it clear that Yuuri is to follow unless he wants to get lost.

"This is Lilia Baranovskaya's Dance school, she and Yakov are married. Rumor had it they had some issues but with the old man as he is they came together for him. Seems getting a kid together really does sometimes save a relationship." 

Yuuri's surprised at the snide tone coming from Yura, almost as if he's jealous, and it's clear that the kid and the old man are the same person, Yuuri just can't seem to figure out how. He's still at a loss when they stop in front of an office and Yura opens the door without even knocking.

"That skater you asked for is here. Can I go now?" 

Yakov Feltsman looks up from his papers. "I'll take it from here. You can get changed and join the next dance class, Lilia commented about your posture and I agree it can use some improvement." At that Yura barges off as cranky as he arrived leaving Yuuri alone with Yakov. The coach looks him over a few times. "I can see what he finds interesting in you. You have good posture, let see if you really have the talent to do his pieces honor." 

With that the man simply walks past Yuuri out of the office and off into some corridor making Yuuri once again simply follow. 

This time they end for the doors to what is clearly a private practice room. There are some soft tones coming from the other side and Yuuri is almost saddens when they stop the moment Yakov knocks. 

"Katsuki Yuuri is here, shall I let him in?" Something about Yakov's tone makes it clear that the person behind the door is somebody dear to him. Expecting that the person on the other side is Yakov's wife he is not prepared to hear a man's voice. Especially as he's certain he knows that voice.

"Da Yakov, let him in. I have gotten Makka." Yuuri's brain rushes through any other option comes to a halt after hearing that name, there is no other option. 

Yakov opens the door and simply pushes Yuuri in when he clearly doesn't move fast enough. The door shuts behind him, leaving him alone in a ballet practice room in Russia with no other than Victor Nikiforov.

Who after all these years looks even more handsome than he did the last time any image of him had been released. The shorter hair makes him look refined, the simple but bespoke suit he wears accents his still lean figure. The sunglasses are a bit odd as they are inside, but then Yuuri's eyes fall on the vest Makka wears, the white cane on the piano, and it becomes all too clear. 

"Oh..." For years Victor will tease Yuuri that the very first thing he ever said in his presence was just a all incorporated Oh.

Victor smiles softly. "Oh indeed." 

Yuuri slowly walks forwards till he's only a few feet away from Victor, Makka moves forward bopping their head against his hand. 

"Don't worry. They's not completely at the job right now as they knows I'm safe while we are inside, so you can pet them if you like." 

Yuuri sinks to his knees and starts to pet the dog he loved so much he got one just like it. He pushes his cheek against Makka's fur missing his Vicchan dearly, trying to order his mind. There is only one question that keeps coming up. 

"How?" 

Victor sighs and slowly sits down on the piano bench, he moves his hand forward and by the first touch Makka turns away from Yuuri to let Victor pet them. 

"That fan that sliced my hair off. Well when I fell I hit my head. It wasn't really bad, I had worse falls on the ice, so I decided not to say anything about it to Yakov." Victor sighs. "There are those moments in life you wish you'd done something different, but they are as they are. During the next few days I started to get spots in my vision, thinking I had simply been too stressed I told Yakov I was going to take the next day off. Thank the stars he did not really agree and came barging into my place the next morning." 

Makka lets out a soft whine, moving closer to Victor who holds the tightly to him just like Yuuri used to hold his Vicchan when he was younger and needed the comfort. 

"He found me in bed, screaming because of this horrid headache I got. Somehow he got out of me I had had issues since the attack and that I had been seeing spots. He called the emergency lines and I was rushed to a private clinic." Victor removes the glasses showing the small faded scars around his eyes. "Two days and several operations later, they had managed to save my eyes but the doctors told Yakov that I would have a big chance in never getting my complete eyesight back. We prayed, but I can only see about twenty percent with my left and as if through a tube with my right. Legally I'm considered blind and the Skating Federation no longer allowed me to skate." 

"It hasn't made me stop following the competitions, I have seen you climb up. Seen you do routines that are inspired by mine. Heard the interviews you gave." Victor stands up so suddenly Yuuri tumbles on his butt. "It's because of that I'm certain you can do this piece. It would have been my piece the finale, the one I'd end my career on. Do you want it?" 

Yuuri feels his head nodding. How else could one respond in a situation like this.

"Then it is yours Yuuri, yours to win all the gold with as I'm certain you will. My Stammi Vicino, non te ne andare."


End file.
